The newlywed period is an exciting time – not only are you still coming down from the buzz of your wedding and all its associated events, you are also getting to know your partner as husband and wife. While this time can be blissful, it can also be a time of adjustment, as you realize that living with someone else and sharing your life with them consists of some give and take. Here are six ways to adjust your expectations and have a fulfilling marriage.

1. Accommodate your spouse’s habits and living style

You’ve had multiple conversations with your spouse about what’s important to each of you. Now that you are living together, it is up to you to make accommodations based on how your spouse lives. Maybe they are a neat freak and like everything in its place – this means you need to figure out how to become more organized and do your part to tidy up. Maybe they need quiet in the morning until they’ve had their coffee – this means that you need to leave important conversations for after dinner.

2. Put your finances together

Money is the #1 topic that couples fight about and for good reason. There is never a relationship where couples make exactly the same money or spend in the same ways. With your expectations already set, now is the time to pool your finances together, open up joint accounts and actively each take part in paying the bills.

3. Decide on who does what

If money is the first topic couples argue about, housework and care of the children comes a close second. Rather than hope and wait for your partner to pick up their socks or do the dishes, have a conversation early in the marriage to decide on who will do what jobs around your home and within your marriage. Studies show that rather than making it a 50/50 split, partners should do the jobs they are best at.

4. Find ways to communicate openly and easily

After having all of these important conversations, it is best if you can figure out a way to keep the conversations open. Like anything, things will change and new things will pop up and as a couple, you need to have a way that you can communicate without fear of judgement or anger. Decide how this will happen in the first months of your marriage.

5. Learn to be selfless

One of the biggest adjustments a person who is newly married will have to make is to be less selfish and more selfless. As a single person, it was easy to think about what you want and only that, but as a partner in a life-long relationship, you need to consider the needs and wants of your partner daily. Rather than make decisions based on your own desires, always think about what they would want first.

6. Realize you are on the same team

Many arguments in a marriage happen because couples have a me vs. you mentality. As a married couple, you are on the same team and have the same goal: to have a fulfilling marriage. Once you realize you are on the same team, only then will you find it easier to get along with your partner.

Planning your wedding is such a joyous time, but it can be a stressful one, especially when you truly just want everything to be perfect. Not only will you be thinking about all of your guests (what they will do, what they will eat and how they will be entertained), you need to think about yourself and your spouse-to-be and how to make the day extra-special. The great thing about getting married in the 2000s is the great amount of technology out there that can make doing your wedding planning so much easier.

Here are 5 of the best wedding planning apps to help you plan your day and make it special.

1. WeddingHappy

This app is for those brides who want to keep tasks, payments and vendors in one spot using their iPhone or iPad. What’s really great about this app is that you can stay connected with your partner, so he knows what’s going on at all times. The app will let you know how many tasks you have to do and how many were completed and even count down the days until your wedding. It truly helps you get down the aisle.

See More: weddinghappy.com

2. Newlywish

A cool part about having a wedding and getting married is that you do get gifts! While you aren’t in it for the gifts, you do want to take part in tailoring these gifts to what you’ll need as a newlywed couple. Enter in Newlywish, the online wedding registry that lets you access many brands, so you don’t have to choose from just one store. Guests can easily buy and get the gifts shipped online and it is very simple for guests to purchase something as a group.

See More: newlywish.com

3. Wedding Wire

If you don’t know where to start, you’ll start here. Wedding Wire lets you get inspiration from other brides, read reviews on vendors and takes the stress out of planning. You can build your seating chart, devise your guest list, manage your budget and so much more. There is a large community on Wedding Wire who can help you with the difficult questions in wedding planning.

See More: Wedding Wire

4. Wedding LookBook by the Knot

When you are planning a wedding, you want expert advice and The Knot knows weddings. This app can help you find the right dress, the right ring, and basically lets you plan your dream wedding easily and its completely free.

Open in App Store: Wedding LookBook by the Knot

5. Appy Couple

Everything in one place is how to look at this app, which has a cool design and allows you to share your plans, photos and other thoughts with your guests, before and after the wedding. You can send save the dates, emails and manage your guest list from the app. You can even send a virtual toast! Up to the minute alerts help you stay in touch with everything you need to for your wedding.

See More: Appy Couple

Meeting Catholic Church Requirements

Young couples today desire accessible, convenient, uplifting, and modern ways of doing things. When planning to marry in the Catholic Church, demands are no different.

That’s why The Marriage Group (in collaboration with the Family Ministries Office at the Catholic Archdiocese of Detroit) pioneered this groundbreaking Catholic Marriage Preparation Course.

This unique program not only meets the needs of modern lifestyles, it fulfills the requirements the Catholic Church places on an approved Pre-Cana program, and facilitates the discussions that need to take place (before entering into the next phase of the relationship between the couple and God).

Certified And Accepted

We realize couples want an authentic and recognized course. That’s why Living Our Faith in Love covers the required discussions, as mandated by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops.

Following successful completion of the discussions, couples are issued an official certificate, personalized with names and date of completion of the program.

This certificate is downloadable and printable, and serves as an official document – recognized by the officiating priest or deacon of the ceremony – to keep with other related marriage documents.

Creating A Special Course

Times have changed and traditional meetings or weekend gatherings aren’t always a convenient way for couples to take the course. Young couples who are faced with demands on their time – be it personal or professional – are less inclined to participate. That’s why this online program is ideal.

  • Not bound by our timelines or demands.
    • Running late at work? Have classes or errands to run? Not to worry. We’re not waiting (and neither are other couples) for folks to arrive at a prescribed time, or a specific location.
    • Whether it’s finished in one day, a weekend, or over the period of few months, it doesn’t matter.What matters is that couples complete each element of the course successfully at a comfortable pace, and as time allows.
  • It’s online. How convenient is that?
    • No need for couples to displace themselves, so bad winter weather, torrential downpours, or transportation issues are never a concern.
    • Participants get to sit in the comfort of their own home – or wherever there is access to an Internet connection.
  • Our program is on-demand.
    • Participants log in at their discretion. The course is always accessible.
    • Couples are not committed to face-to-face meetings, or one-on-one mentoring Although viable options, they are not always possible for everyone.
  • Location is not an issue.
    • Couples who are separated by distance can still connect (via Skype, for instance) to complete the course.
    • This course is accessible from anywhere. Whether in Michigan, somewhere else in the US, or even abroad, it’s available.

You can find similar course providers, but as the originator and developer of this most unique and modernized program, The Marriage Group’s materials and presenter insights are always novel and fresh – not rehashed.

So when couples are ready start a Catholic marriage conversation, they can come out ahead with Living Our Faith in Love’s comprehensive course.

 

 

 

Finding a partner to share the rest of your life with is a blessing. If you’ve recently gotten engaged and are planning to take your marriage vows in the Catholic Church, there are a few steps to doing so. Catholics recognize marriage as a Sacrament, so taking these important steps will prepare you for the lifetime of love and commitment that you are now embarking on.

1. Fulfill Important Requirements

In order to be married within the Catholic Church, there are a number of important requirements that must be fulfilled before you are even able to be considered.

  • Baptized Christian
    One of the partners need to be Catholic and if the other is not Catholic, he or she need to be a baptized Christian. If you were not baptized as a child, you may go through the process of becoming a Catholic as an adult.
  • Not closely related
    Both partners cannot be closely related and this includes being cousins.
  • Free to marry
    In order to be married in the Catholic Church, both spouses may not be currently married. If they were previously married, the previous spouse must either be deceased, or there must have been a declaration of nullity from the Church. In order to get this declaration, there needs to have been contractual defects in the marriage.
  • Be of the opposite sex
    The Catholic Church only recognizes marriages between a man and a woman, so partners need to be of the opposite sex in order to be married in the Church.
  • In good standing of the Church
    The definition of “in good standing” will differ from Church to Church. Basically, you do need to have regular attendance at your Church and have no scandals or immoral behavior. If you are currently living unwed with your partner, you will need to discuss this with the priest.
  • Free consent
    Both parties must freely consent to the marriage and have already worked out any issues that might cause one party not to freely consent.

2. Contact your Parish

Once you believe that you meet the requirements as stated above (or if you need to discuss them), you should contact your Parish to discuss your wedding. You will need to obtain permission to be married in the Church, whether it is at your current Parish or elsewhere. While it is not required that you be a registered member, it is definitely helpful in the process. You will meet with the clergy and get to know them and they’ll get to know you and you can discuss any issues you may have with getting married in the Catholic Church. If they have any requisite fees, you will pay them at this point or give a monetary gift.

3. Take a marriage preparation program

In order to recognize if you are ready for marriage and to prepare you for issues that you’ll inevitably face in your marriage, taking a marriage preparation course is mandatory for most marriages that occur within the Catholic Church. During the course, you’ll learn about balancing values, money, the role of family, healthy sexuality and intimacy, planning a family and parenting, communication skills and the theology of marriage. Fortunately, there are online courses that you can take that will suit your busy schedule and allow you learn about marriage, fulfilling the Catholic Church’s requirements.

4. Provide your certificates to the Church

There are a number of documents that the Church will want to see before granting you permission to marry. These include:

  • Baptismal certificates
  • Certification of Holy Communion and Confirmation
  • Affidavit of Freedom to Marry
  • Civil marriage license
  • Marriage Preparation Course Completion Certificate

5. Get married!

Once you’ve fulfilled all of the important steps to getting married in the Catholic Church, you can now choose your date and get married.

Congratulations! You just got engaged and you are excited to begin planning your wedding! You’ve talked with your priest or deacon and they told you that you need to take a marriage prep, or Pre-Cana class, to be married in the parish. But what exactly is Pre-Cana?

Simply put, Pre-Cana is a marriage preparation course, class, or consultation for couples who will be married in a Catholic church.

Cana is the name of the town in which performed the miracle of turning water into wine; see John 2:1-11.

While most dioceses and parishes still call it Pre-Cana, there are a growing number that are beginning to refer to it as the more modern term, “marriage prep.”

So what are these classes actually like?

There are a few different ways a parish may have you take your Pre-Cana including one or more of:

  • A course taken during a single day, usually on the weekend
  • Meetings with your priest or deacon over the span of a few weeks
  • Meetings with a sponsor couple, who is a married couple that acts as mentors to engaged couples
  • An Engaged Encounter weekend retreat with other engaged couples
  • A Pre-Marital Inventory such as FOCCUS, Prepare/Enrich, or Catholic Couple Checkup
  • An online version of the in person classes, usually on-demand and self led

While the exact format for these courses varies from parish to parish, the concept and content is consistent, with the most common topics discussed being: Spiritually and Faith, Conflict Resolution, Careers, Finances, Intimacy and Cohabitation, Children and Parenting, Commitment, and Family of Origin.

Living Our Faith in Love - Online Pre-Cana

What’s the point?

Most couples will already have had these conversations before even getting engaged, so what’s the point of the Pre-Cana then? The purpose of marriage preparation is not to be another hoop to jump through, but it is meant to facilitate discussions about important topics that you will be facing as a married couple.

Look at your marriage prep process as an opportunity to look forward toward your new life together, make sure you are on the same page as a couple, and ready to face this exciting journey as one.