The Ultimate Guide to Pre-Cana
Everything You Need to Know About Catholic Marriage Preparation
So what is Pre-Cana, anyway?
Pre-Cana is a marriage preparation course, class, or consultation for couples who will be married in a Catholic church.
Marriage preparation is required of all couples who are going to take the Sacrament of Marriage in the Catholic Church.
A Pre-Cana course can consist of single day events, a series of meetings with your priest or deacon, having a mentor or sponsor couple guide you through conversations, an online course, or a weekend retreat.
Regardless of format, you will have the same discussions ensuring you are on the same page as a couple and are fully prepared to enter marriage together, as a couple.
Read More: What is Pre-Cana in the Catholic Church?
What happens during Pre-Cana?
Regardless of the format of your Pre-Cana, the main thing that will happen is you and your fiancé will have focused and in-depth conversations on a range of topics.
These topics will be important for you as a couple in your upcoming marriage and will ensure you are both in agreement and aware of each others view for each of them.
They can include Family of Origin (your existing family and traditions), finances, communication, career goals, conflict resolution, intimacy and sexuality, Natural Family Planning (NFP), and the Spirituality and Theology of Marriage, among others.
Right now is the perfect time to sit down and discuss these. Even if you have had conversations on the topic before, it’s a good idea to revisit them and make sure you are both fully open about your wishes and wants in your new life as a married couple.
Read More: What Do You Do at Pre-Cana?
Why is it important?
Marriage preparation is not only learning about the religious, spiritual, or theological aspects of the sacrament of marriage.
Preparation for marriage also includes practical conversations that will help you in those “day-to-day aspects” of forming a new family.
Family traditions, finances, conflict resolution, intimacy and sexuality, and several more are important topics that will help you prepare for important issues that we often forget to talk about before and during marriage.
Read More: What’s the Point of Doing Pre-Cana?
Pre-Cana Options and Formats
There are a few different ways a parish may have you take your Pre-Cana including one or more of:
- A course taken during a single day, usually on the weekend
- Meetings with your priest or deacon over the span of a few weeks
- Meetings with a sponsor couple, who is a married couple that acts as mentors to engaged couples
- An Engaged Encounter weekend retreat with other engaged couples
- A Pre-Marital Inventory such as FOCCUS, Prepare/Enrich, or Catholic Couple Checkup
- An online version of the in person classes, usually on-demand and self led
While the exact format for these courses varies from parish to parish, the concept and content is consistent, with the most common topics discussed being: Spiritually and Faith, Conflict Resolution, Careers, Finances, Intimacy and Cohabitation, Children and Parenting, Commitment, and Family of Origin.
What Are Inventories?
Premarital Inventories are often used as part of the overall marriage preparation process.
Inventories are a series of questions that both the Bride and Groom will complete separately. They will then receive a feedback report and work through it with whoever is assisting in their marriage preparation.
It’s not a compatibility test, but is another tool to find the strengths of your relationship as well as potential areas that may need further discussion.
When Should We Start Pre-Cana?
When to start your marriage preparation varies between each Diocese and Parish, however it is most commonly recommended to complete it around six months prior to your wedding date.
This ensures you have plenty of time to have all of the discussions you need and can work through any of issues before getting too close to your wedding date.
Planning a Catholic Wedding Ceremony
Planning a wedding ceremony can be difficult at times, but always rewarding in the end. Planning a Catholic wedding ceremony has a few extra nuances that need to be taken into consideration.
So why a Catholic wedding?
Getting married in the Catholic Church is exciting for several reasons.
Instead of having a carnal outlook on the ceremony, Catholic couples understand that marriage is a sacrament. It is a wholly moving and deeply emotional experience to recite your vows and make the public declaration of your love to your partner.
This public act of the deepest declaration of love and devotion becomes all the more profound when delivered at a Catholic wedding.
Read More: Planning a Catholic Wedding Ceremony