Couples Catholic Marriage Archives

Surviving When Chaos Breaks Out: A Catholic Marriage Guide

Read Time: 4 minutes

Have you ever felt like your marriage was being tested by a perfect storm of challenges? Last week, as I sat in our dimly lit kitchen after putting our flu-stricken daughter to bed, watching my wife recover from major surgery, I couldn’t help but smile at the wedding vow echo: “in sickness and in health.” We were definitely living the “sickness” part of that promise, and yet, through God’s grace, we were not just surviving – we were growing stronger.

Prep Time is Key: Creating “Micro Advents” in Marriage

Just as Advent prepares us for both Christmas and Christ’s Second Coming, I’ve learned that marriage requires its own “micro advents” – periods of preparation for the unexpected storms of life. This lesson hit home recently as our family navigated multiple health challenges while trying to maintain our spiritual practices.

My wife and I had been praying a Eucharistic Consecration set to conclude on the Feast of the Holy Family. We’d also set up our Advent wreath and committed to the Saint Andrew Novena. Last year, my ambitious plan to pray this novena 15 times daily crumbled under holiday chaos. This year, though, we came prepared: little prayer slips taped near light switches and frequently visited spots throughout our home. Our oldest son even stepped up to lead our family prayers morning and night – a beautiful fruit born from preparation.

It Takes a Village to Raise a Marriage

We often hear that it takes a village to raise a child, but I’ve discovered an even deeper truth: it takes a village to raise a marriage. The Catechism reminds us that “the mutual love of spouses becomes an image of the absolute and unfailing love with which God loves man” (CCC 1604). This mirror of divine love isn’t meant to be polished in isolation.

While marriage is technically between husband, wife, and our Triune God, thriving marriages are supported by a broader community of love. In the weeks following my wife’s surgery, this truth manifested in practical ways:

Friends delivering home-cooked meals, freeing us to focus on recovery and maintaining our prayer life
My wife and mother-in-law building a relationship so strong they talk more than I do with my own mom
Both our fathers modeling patience and kindness in ways that continue to shape our marriage

The Cloud of Witnesses: From Heaven to Your Home

Sometimes the “village” supporting your marriage extends beyond earth into heaven. In 2018, my wife and I began intentionally developing friendships with particular saints: Teresa of Avila, Catherine of Siena, Gerard of Majella, and Our Lady Undoer of Knots. During a frightening potential miscarriage, these heavenly friends stood with us as we sought the Anointing of the Sick for our unborn child. Through their intercession and this powerful Sacrament, our daughter was saved.

Since then, we’ve expanded our circle of heavenly friends to include St. Jude, St. Louis de Montfort, St. Mother Teresa, and others. Their prayers, wisdom, and examples have become woven into the fabric of our marriage. We share their stories, memorize their quotes, and call upon them daily.

Practical Steps for Weathering the Storms

Create “Micro Advents” in Your Marriage
- Set up prayer reminders in visible places around your home
- Prepare emergency prayer cards or devotional materials
- Build routine spiritual practices that can sustain you in difficult times
Cultivate Your Marriage Village
- Connect regularly with other Catholic couples
- Foster healthy relationships with in-laws
- Don’t hesitate to accept help when needed
Develop Saintly Friendships
- Choose patron saints for your marriage
- Learn their stories and prayers
- Make them part of your daily family conversation

Remember, chaos in marriage isn’t just something to endure – it’s an opportunity for grace to shine through. When preparation meets divine providence, even the stormiest seasons can strengthen your sacramental bond.

Just as our family discovered that strategic prayer card placement could transform our novena experience, small preparations in your marriage can make a profound difference when challenges arise. Through the support of earthly and heavenly friends, and most importantly, through God’s unfailing grace, your marriage can not only survive chaos but emerge stronger and holier.

The key is remembering that you’re never alone in this journey. Whether it’s a friend dropping off a meal, a saint interceding on your behalf, or the Holy Spirit guiding your steps, God provides the support we need – often before we even know we need it.

Author: Matt Chicoine

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

* The Marriage Group is an Amazon Affiliate and will earn from qualifying purchases.

March 4, 2026/by Matthew Chicoine

Date Night Ideas When You Can’t Find a Babysitter

Couples Catholic Marriage

Read Time: 4 minutes

Hey there fellow married folks with kids! Remember those days when you and your spouse could just spontaneously decide to hit the town for a romantic evening? Yeah, me neither. But just because we’ve traded in our dancing shoes for diaper bags doesn’t mean the dating has to stop. In fact, it’s more important than ever!

As the wise folks at Catholic.net remind us, “Dating shouldn’t stop with marriage. In fact, it should be a regular part of married life.” Amen to that! Regular date nights help keep the spark alive, improve communication, and remind us why we fell in love in the first place. Plus, it’s a great excuse to change out of those sweatpants you’ve been wearing for… how many days now?

But let’s face it, finding a babysitter can be harder than getting a toddler to eat broccoli. So, what’s a couple to do? Fear not, my friends! I’ve got six fantastic at-home date night ideas that’ll help you grow in holiness and closeness, all without leaving the comfort of your living room (or stepping on a stray Lego).

Bonding over Board Games

Now, I’m not talking about Candy Land or Chutes and Ladders (though if that’s your jam, no judgment here). I’m talking about grown-up games that’ll get your competitive juices flowing and create lasting memories.

A few summers ago, my wife and I started a tradition of playing backgammon. It quickly became our go-to way to unwind and connect after the kids were in bed. We’ve since leveled up to a full-blown Summer Tournament, where the winner gets to pick the next game and we keep a running total of points. Nothing says “I love you” quite like crushing your spouse at Scrabble, Hearts, or Carcassonne, am I right?

Cooking Together

They say the way to a person’s heart is through their stomach, so why not cook up some love in the kitchen? Pick a new recipe you’ve both been dying to try, or recreate the meal from your first date. You can also pick a recipe that ties back to the liturgical or saint feast day. I highly recommend Living the Seasons as a recipe resource to try new dinners related to your Catholic faith.

Cooking together is a great way to practice teamwork, communication, and patience. Plus, you get a delicious meal at the end! Just remember, if things go south, there’s always takeout (*dials the local bar & grill for burgers).

YouTube Dance Lessons

Remember when you used to hit the dance floor together? No? Me neither. But that doesn’t mean we can’t learn! Thanks to the magic of YouTube, you can turn your living room into a dance studio. From salsa to swing, there’s a tutorial out there for every style.

Not only is dancing great exercise, but it’s also a fun way to laugh together and get physically close. Just be prepared for some stepped-on toes and furniture bumping. And maybe warn the kids beforehand so they don’t think Mom and Dad have lost their minds.

Pickleball in the Driveway

Pickleball: it’s not just for retirees anymore! This fast-growing sport is taking the nation by storm, and for good reason. It’s easy to learn, fun to play, and a great way to get your heart pumping.

My wife and I have found that a quick game of pickleball is one of the fastest ways to get us in the right state of mind and help us relax. Plus, it’s a great excuse to show off those neon sweatbands you (or your parents) have been saving since the ’80s.

Book Study Date

Who says intellectual stimulation can’t be romantic? Pick a book you both want to read (might I suggest “The Five Love Languages” or “Holy Marriage, Happy Marriage”), and set aside time during naps or after bedtime to discuss it.

Remember, the couple that prays together stays together, and those who read together… well, you get smarter and more creative! Plus, it gives you something to talk about besides whose turn it is to change the diaper or why there’s an old piece of cheese in the Little Tykes car.

Stargazing and Dreaming

Sometimes, the simplest dates are the best. Once the kids are asleep, grab a blanket and the baby monitor and head out to your backyard or balcony. Lie back, look up at the stars, and just… be. Talk about your dreams, your fears, your hopes for the future. Remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.

This is also a great time for prayer together. As Saint John Paul II said, “The future of humanity passes by way of the family.” Your relationship is the foundation of your family, so nurturing it is crucial not just for you, but for your children and the world.

Remember, the goal of these date nights isn’t perfection. It’s about intentionally setting aside time to focus on each other, grow together, and have some fun along the way. So don’t stress if the soufflé falls or if you trip over your own feet during the salsa lesson. The important thing is that you’re doing it together.

So there you have it, folks! Six ways to keep the romance alive without leaving the house or bribing the teenager next door to babysit. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a backgammon rematch to prepare for. My wife may have won the last game, but this time… well, let’s be honest, she’ll probably win again. I did promise to love her in good times and in bad(gammon).

Author: Matt Chicoine

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

* The Marriage Group is an Amazon Affiliate and will earn from qualifying purchases.

February 19, 2026/by Matthew Chicoine

7 Things I Learned…

Couples Catholic Marriage, Married

Read Time: 4 minutes

When I got married at the ripe young age of 23, I never actually thought I would reach this milestone: 14 years of being married. Not because I didn’t believe in the permanence of the sacrament of matrimony nor because I wasn’t in it for the long haul. But when you are younger it is difficult to comprehend time in terms of decades.

Time I have found flies faster than Saint Padre Pio can bilocate (I’m really not joking as time really does fly). While I’m not yet at the Yoda-level of wisdom I have acquired some valuable insights over the nearly decade-and-a-half years of being married. Here’s 7 things I learned from being married for 14 years.

Marriage Takes More than Two to Tango

The sacrament of marriage is the union of a man and woman, but it’s held together by God. I wouldn’t have survived these years if it wasn’t for the Holy Trinity sending me and my wife daily graces. A lasting marriage requires God at the center.

Every day is a New Opportunity to Pledge Your Love

This subheader is a bit corny but it’s true: marriage is full of ups and downs. But each day is another chance to show your love to your spouse. I’m grateful for the many times to try again and be a better husband than yesterday.

Marriage is Salty

In the Gospel of Matthew, Chapter 5, Verse 13, we read that Jesus said, “You are the salt of the earth.” You and your spouse are meant to be a witness to the Gospel. Like salt, married persons are to be a preservative in a culture that prefers passing fads over long-term relationships. A little bit of salt can go a long way and I have learned that my “little” marriage of 14 years can go a long way in sharing the Good News to the world.

Humor and Holiness

I was initially attracted to my wife’s humor and enthusiastic personality. Her zest for life was (and still is) contagious. During tough times, humor has been healing to get my wife and me back on track with our spiritual life, both individually and as a couple.

Find someone you can laugh with during the good times and especially the bad times and you will be incredibly grateful. My wife and I have developed a plethora of inside jokes, zingers, and anecdotes we refer to again and again.

Share Patron Saints

Your network is your net worth. Business cliche but still accurate when you think about the spiritual life. One of my favorite teachings of the Catholic Church is the Communion of Saints. We are not meant to journey toward God alone, and you are not limited to earthly helpers like your spouse. The saints in heaven and the Church on earth are ready to provide support and comfort throughout your marriage.

My wife and I have developed a great friendship with the saints. Our nightly prayers conclude with asking Saints Teresa of Avila, Catherine of Siena, Gerard of Majella, and Jude to intercede for us. I have also formed a special devotion to my wife’s confirmation saint (Maria Faustina).

God is With You Always

Over the past 14 years, I have learned that the phrase “God is with you always” is not a pious saying. It’s a reality! God is with you in the sacrament of the Eucharist and Reconciliation. But just as real, and on a more daily basis is the tangible presence of God in my marriage. The Holy Trinity indwells in both my wife and I by virtue of our Baptism and by the graces we receive in the sacrament of Matrimony.

Certainly, there are days I don’t feel like God is with me but He is always present.

Know Your Spouse’s Love Language

In 1992, Gary Chapman wrote The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate.* He detailed out five primary ways to show your love and how your spouse receives love. These include:

Words of affirmation (compliments, praise, appreciation)
Quality time (spending time together and giving each other undivided attention)
Physical touch (demonstrating physical affection, such as giving your partner a hug or kiss)
Acts of service (doing something that helps a partner, such as running an errand)
Receiving gifts (giving your partner a present that communicates thoughtfulness, effort, or expense)

Admittedly, this is something I am constantly needing to improve upon. My wife’s love language is acts of service, words of affirmation, and quality time. Knowing how your spouse best communicates love is a great way to grow in your marriage.

Bonus Lessons Learned

I could continue on with a laundry list of things I learned from being married 14 years. But this article would be as long as the Lord of the Rings Trilogy and you do need to get back to being an epic spouse. Before we end this post here’s a few bonus things I learned:

Be flexible- family life involves lots of moving parts (and persons)
Saying sorry and asking for forgiveness isn’t as painful as you think it is
Don’t worry about winning the battle at the cost of losing the marriage
Things are usually less serious than you make them to be- laugh more often

In conclusion, reflecting on 14 years of marriage has shown me that the journey of matrimony is both a challenge and a blessing. It’s a testament to the enduring power of commitment, strengthened not only by the love between husband and wife but also by the grace of God. Each day presents an opportunity to reaffirm love, grow in understanding, and deepen spiritual connections.

Through laughter, shared faith, and mutual support, my wife and I have navigated ups and downs, embracing the wisdom that comes from humility, forgiveness, and a willingness to adapt. As we look forward, I am reminded that marriage, rooted in faith and nurtured by love, continues to be a journey worth cherishing—one that enriches not only our lives but also the world around us.

Author: Matt Chicoine

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

* The Marriage Group is an Amazon Affiliate and will earn from qualifying purchases.

January 22, 2026/by Matthew Chicoine

Finding Light in Marriage’s Dark Moments: A Lesson From Mary

Couples Catholic Marriage, Married

Read Time: 3 minutes

It was 7:55 p.m. on a Sunday night when God chose to teach me a lesson about marriage through an unexpected source – the moon and Our Blessed Mother. My wife and I had just weathered one of those days that tested a marriage’s strength: a sick child, missed meals, and the constant juggling of family responsibilities. I found myself in a drive-thru line, finally getting dinner for my exhausted wife and myself.

As I waited for the car ahead to move, I glimpsed the full moon hanging in the night sky – bright and majestic. In that moment, God reminded me of something profound about both Our Lady and marriage itself.

The Hidden Grace in Difficult Moments

Just as the moon illuminates the darkness, Mary guides us through marriage’s challenging seasons. My wife and I were in the middle of a 33-day Marian consecration, set to conclude on the Feast of the Presentation. Through this spiritual journey together, we’ve discovered how Mary’s presence in our marriage mirrors her role at the foot of the cross – standing faithful in both light and shadow.

St. Mother Teresa spoke about the darkness beneath the cross, where Mary stood with John. Rather than flee this shadow, she remained present, teaching us a profound lesson about marriage: it’s often in our darkest moments – the arguments, the misunderstandings, the exhausted evenings – where we find the deepest opportunities for grace.

Mary as Our Marriage Guide

When we struggle to see God’s presence in our marriage, Mary shows us the way. Like a marathon runner’s companion, she runs alongside married couples:

During communication breakdowns, she who pondered everything in her heart teaches us to listen deeply
In moments of sacrifice, she who stood at the cross shows us how to love through pain
When feeling distant from God or spouse, she who experienced the flight to Egypt reminds us to trust the journey

The Star of Our Domestic Church

The ancient mariners called Mary the Star of the Sea, and she serves a similar role in marriage. Just as I found myself looking up at the moon while getting late-night dinner for my wife, Mary illuminates the small acts of love that build a holy marriage. She guides us through the night until we reach dawn – those moments when we glimpse Christ in our spouse again.

A Practical Path Forward

For couples seeking to invite Mary’s guidance into their marriage, consider:

Praying together daily, even briefly, asking Mary’s intercession
Finding moments to serve each other, remembering Mary’s fiat
Looking for Christ in your spouse, especially during challenging times
Supporting each other through spiritual darkness, standing together as Mary and John did

From Darkness to Light

Marriage, like faith, moves through seasons of light and shadow. The beauty of having Mary as our guide is that she understands both. She shows us how to remain faithful in darkness while always pointing us toward the Light of Christ.

Even as dawn breaks in our marriages – those moments of joy, reconciliation, and renewed love – Mary remains present, like the moon visible in morning light. She teaches us that true marital love always directs us toward her Son, where our deepest unity is found.

In those everyday moments of marriage – whether we’re caring for sick children, making late-night food runs, or simply trying to understand each other better – Mary stands ready to guide us. She reminds us that every act of sacrificial love in marriage, no matter how small, reflects the light of Christ to the world.

Author: Matt Chicoine

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

January 14, 2026/by Matthew Chicoine

Living Out Your Marriage During Holiday Stress

Couples Catholic Marriage, Married

Read Time: 3 minutes

The holiday season brings a unique blend of joy and challenge to married life. Between shopping lists, family gatherings, and end-of-year commitments, even the strongest marriages can feel stretched thin. Yet these moments of stress can become opportunities for deeper connection and spiritual growth.

Virtue in the Chaos

Marriage during the holidays tests our patience like few other seasons. Just as my wife and I learned while preparing for her major surgery, disruption to family routines requires intentional grace. With four young children, including two sons with autism, we’ve discovered that virtue isn’t about perfection – it’s about choosing love in small moments.

When schedules shift and tensions rise, practice small acts of virtue. A gentle word when your spouse forgets an item (evaporated milk!) on the shopping list. A moment of patience when holiday preparations don’t go as planned. These seemingly minor choices build a foundation of love that withstands seasonal stress.

Gratitude as Your Anchor

“Gratitude is the memory of the heart,” wrote St. Mary Euphrasia Pelletier. When the world moves at lightning pace and pressures mount faster than holiday credit card bills, taking time to appreciate your spouse becomes essential. The catch? As with any gift from God, we must choose to accept it.

St. Josemaria Escriva reminds us to “Get used to lifting your heart to God, in acts of thanksgiving, many times a day. Because he gives you this and that; because you have been despised; because you haven’t what you need or because you have. Thank him for everything, because everything is good.”

In our family, we’ve found beauty in unexpected moments. When our daughters created a homemade bouquet to remember their sibling lost to miscarriage, it brought tears of grateful recognition – even in loss, love grows. These moments remind us that gratitude isn’t about perfect circumstances but about seeing God’s grace in all seasons.

Find Time to Relax Together

Amidst the holiday rush, carving out time for connection becomes both more challenging and more crucial. My wife and I share funny memes and one-liners throughout the day, finding humor in life’s chaos. Whether it’s laughing about our son (our “one-man football team”) running through the living room or sharing children’s innocent observations about faith, these moments of lightness strengthen our bond.

My wife and I love playing board games so we make it a point to put the kids to bed early some Fridays to spend quality time together. Pandemic Legacy, Backgammon, and deck-building games are some of our favorites.

Create small rituals of relaxation that fit your schedule. Even five minutes of shared quiet with a cup of coffee can become sacred space on a busy day.

Praying Together

The foundation of managing holiday stress lies in shared prayer. This year, my wife and I completed both a Eucharistic and Marian Consecration. These spiritual journeys provided an anchor during life’s curveballs – or should I say snowballs during winter?

When my wife was telling me about the anxiety she was facing thinking about work and the surgery, I told her, “Remember tonight we are starting the Eucharistic Consecration. There’s no better cure to worry than thinking about our Lord.” And on the days where I felt angst from all the various things I had to do for work my wife reminded me to trust in Jesus and ask the Blessed Virgin Mary for help.

New Marriages The Holidays and The Extended Family

Prayer doesn’t require elaborate plans. Start small: a shared morning offering, grace before meals, or evening gratitude. Let prayer become your pathway to peace, turning holiday chaos into opportunities for spiritual intimacy.

Remember, your marriage isn’t meant to achieve perfection but to grow in love through all seasons. As you navigate holiday stress together, let faith be your foundation and grace your guide. After all, the greatest gift you can give each other this season is the gift of presence – both to each other and to God.

Author: Matt Chicoine

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

November 18, 2025/by Matthew Chicoine

Marriage: One of the Greatest Adventures

Couples Catholic Marriage

Read Time: 4 minutes

You know that moment when you’re folding laundry for the umpteenth time, or maybe you’re elbow-deep in dishes, and suddenly you wonder, “Is this all there is to married life?” Well, let me tell you, my friend, you’re not alone. I’ve been there, standing in a sea of mismatched socks, wondering if I’d somehow missed the memo on the grand adventure marriage was supposed to be.

But here’s the thing: what if I told you that right where you are, in the midst of the everyday chaos of married life, you’re actually on the greatest adventure of your faith journey?

The Unexpected Call

Remember how it all started? That flutter in your heart when you first met your spouse? That was God’s first whisper of the adventure He had in store for you. Just like He called those fishermen to become apostles, He called you and your spouse to this incredible journey of marriage.

I’m reminded of this every time I read The Hobbit to our kids at bedtime. There’s this moment when Gandalf says to Bilbo, “I am looking for someone to share in an adventure that I am arranging, and it’s very difficult to find anyone.” Doesn’t that sound a bit like God calling us to the adventure of marriage?

Let’s face it, once the honeymoon phase wears off and we realize this journey involves dirty diapers, mortgage payments, and compromising on what to watch on Netflix, it’s tempting to think we’ve somehow wandered off the path of adventure. But as Saint John Paul II wisely said, “Life with Christ is a wonderful adventure.” And nowhere is this more true than in the sacrament of marriage.

When Doubt Creeps In

Now, I’ll be honest with you. There have been days when I’ve looked at my spouse across the breakfast table and thought, “Are we cut out for this?” The worry creeps in: “What if I’m not patient enough, loving enough, or tough enough for this marriage gig?”

Sound familiar? It’s what I like to call the “Marriage Imposter Syndrome.” But here’s where we need to lean into our faith. Remember what St. Peter said? “Cast all your worries upon him because he cares for you” (1 Peter 5:7). This applies to your marriage too!

In those moments of doubt, when the dishes are piled high and you haven’t had a date night in months, remember the words of Pope Benedict XVI: “The world offers you comfort, but you were not made for comfort. You were made for greatness.” Your marriage? It’s a path to that greatness.

Just Do It: The Marriage Edition

Now, I’m not suggesting you add a Nike swoosh on your wedding ring, but there’s something to be said for their slogan when it comes to marriage. Sometimes, you’ve just got to do it. Make that bed together even when you’re grumpy. Say “I love you” even when your spouse forgot to buy milk… again.

These aren’t extraordinary acts, but day after day, they compound into something beautiful. It’s like Jesus said, “Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations” (Matthew 28:19-20). In marriage, it might sound more like, “Go, therefore, and love each other, even when it’s hard, showing the world what God’s love looks like.”

Shining Your Light Together

You and your spouse? You’re a team. And together, you have a light to shine that’s uniquely yours. Maybe it’s the way you welcome others into your home, how you support each other’s dreams, or the grace you show in forgiving each other’s mistakes.

I’ll let you in on a secret: there are days when I feel like hiding under that proverbial basket. Days when the adventure of marriage feels more like a slog through the marshes of Mordor (yes, I’m a Tolkien fan, can you tell?). But then I remember Saint Francis of Assisi’s advice: “Start by doing what’s necessary; then do what’s possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible.”

In marriage, sometimes the necessary thing is just showing up. It’s choosing love when you don’t feel like it. It’s forgiving for the hundredth time. And before you know it, you’re doing what once seemed impossible – building a life of love that reflects God’s own love for His people.

Your Marriage Adventure Awaits

So, my dear friends, are you ready to see your marriage as the grand adventure it truly is? It may not always feel like you’re scaling Mount Doom (last Tolkien reference, I promise), but every act of love, every choice to serve your spouse, every shared prayer is part of this incredible journey.

The call has been issued. The greatest adventure of your faith life isn’t in some far-off mission field – it’s right there in your home, in your marriage. It’s time to cast aside your worries, trust in God’s care, and just do it. Love fiercely, forgive freely, and let your marriage be a light to the world.

Who knows? Your next load of laundry might just be the start of the most exciting chapter yet in your marriage adventure. Are you ready?

Author: Matt Chicoine

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

October 30, 2025/by Matthew Chicoine

Build the Bridge of Your Marriage

Couples Catholic Marriage

Read Time: 3 minutes

Bridges take time to build…lots of time. It also takes time to build your marriage. Along with time it requires effort and the right tools. Here’s how you can apply some bridge-building to your relationship:

Solid Foundation: Every good bridge needs a strong base. In your marriage, that’s your shared faith. Make sure you’re both firmly planted in Christ before you start adding any fancy architectural features.
Proper Materials: You wouldn’t build a bridge out of marshmallows, would you? (Though that sounds delicious.) In marriage, your building materials are trust, communication, and forgiveness. Stock up on these – you’ll need plenty!
Skilled Workers: Bridge builders need to know their stuff. For your marriage, that means constantly learning and growing together. Attend marriage prep classes, read books on relationships, and maybe even try a couple’s retreat. You’re never too old (or too married) to learn new tricks!
Regular Maintenance: Bridges need constant care to stay strong. Same goes for your marriage! Regular date nights, daily check-ins, and frequent expressions of love and appreciation are your relationship’s maintenance crew.

Stretching Towards Each Other

Jesus stretched out His arms on the cross. It represents him bridging the gap between us and God the Father. In your marriage, you’ll need to do some stretching too. It might be uncomfortable, and sometimes painful, but it’s worth it.

This could mean:

Stepping out of your comfort zone to support your spouse’s dreams
Reaching out to offer forgiveness after an argument
Extending yourself to meet your partner’s needs, even when you’re tired

Bridging the Gaps

Every couple faces gaps in their relationship – differences in opinion, background, or even in how you load the dishwasher (Raise your hand if your spouse loads it like a rabid racoon!). Your job as a married duo is to be constant bridge builders, always finding ways to connect despite these gaps.

Some bridge-building strategies:

Active listening (Put down that phone!)
Seeking to understand before being understood
Finding compromises that work for both of you

The Sacramental Bridge

Here’s where it gets really cool. In the Catholic Church, marriage itself is a sacrament – a visible sign of God’s invisible grace. Your marriage is literally a bridge that helps you and others encounter God’s love!

So, every time you:

Forgive each other
Support each other through tough times
Celebrate each other’s successes
Or even just share a laugh over a bad Dad joke

You’re not just strengthening your own relationship – you’re showing the world a glimpse of God’s unconditional love.

Your Call to Action

Alright, future and current bridge builders, here’s your mission:

Reflect on your marriage (or future marriage) as a bridge. Where are the strong points? Where might you need some reinforcement?
Choose one “bridge-building” action to focus on this week. Maybe it’s a date night, a heartfelt conversation, or just picking up those socks without being asked.
Pray together, asking God – the ultimate Bridge Builder – to guide and strengthen your relationship.

Remember, just as the Incarnation bridged the gap between God and humanity, your marriage can be a beautiful bridge of love in this world. So grab your hard hats, your love tools, and start building!

May your bridges be strong, your love be deep, and your socks always find their way to the laundry basket. God bless your marriage!

Author: Matt Chicoine

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

October 30, 2025/by Matthew Chicoine

Harvest Holiness: October Saints Nurture Marital Love

Couples, Couples Catholic Marriage

Read Time: 4 minutes

As the leaves turn vibrant shades of red and gold, October brings not just the beauty of autumn but also a spiritual bounty for married couples. My wife’s birthday falls during this month, reminding me of the precious gift of marriage God has blessed us with. It’s also a time rich with feast days of saints who can offer profound wisdom for our marital journeys.

Seasons of Change, Unchanging Love

October is a month of transition. It starts with trees full of colorful leaves and ends with bare branches, colder weather, and earlier sunsets. This changing of seasons can be symbolic of the various phases our marriages go through. Just as nature prepares for the coming winter, we too can weather the changing seasons of our relationships by recentering our focus on the Unchanging One—God.

As Joshua 24:15 reminds us, “As for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.” This commitment to serving God together can be our anchor through all of life’s transitions. Most of our adult lives occur in this “not-yet-at-the-end” period, much like October leading into November and the end of the liturgical year. The honeymoon or springtime of marriage goes by so quickly, and it’s easy to fall prey to the temptation of judging our marriage solely by how we feel in the moment. Instead, let’s look to the saints and our faith to guide us through each season.

The Month of the Holy Rosary

October is dedicated to the Most Holy Rosary, a powerful tool for strengthening our marriages. Saint Louis de Montfort wisely advised, “Recite your Rosary with faith, with humility, with confidence, and with perseverance.” These qualities—faith, humility, confidence, and perseverance—are not only crucial for praying the Rosary but also for nurturing a strong, lasting marriage. Consider making the Rosary a part of your daily routine as a couple, allowing Mary’s intercession to guide your relationship. Now, let’s explore how five remarkable saints, celebrated in October, can illuminate and strengthen your marriage:

1. St. Thérèse of Lisieux (October 1)

The Little Flower’s wisdom is a balm for any marriage. She taught that it’s not the grandeur of our actions but the love behind them that matters. In the daily grind of married life, it’s easy to focus on tasks and forget the loving intention behind them. Whether it’s doing the dishes or planning a date night, St. Thérèse reminds us to infuse every action with love for our spouse.

2. Guardian Angels (October 2)

Every night, my children and I pray to our guardian angels before bed. This practice can be a beautiful addition to your family routine, fostering a sense of divine protection over your household. As a couple, consider praying together for your angels’ guidance in your relationship. The Catechism reminds us that “human life is surrounded by their watchful care and intercession” (CCC 336). Imagine the power of heavenly beings watching over your marriage!

3. St. Francis of Assisi (October 4)

Francis’s radical embrace of poverty can inspire us to examine our priorities in marriage. Are we too focused on material possessions? How can we simplify our lives to focus more on each other? His famous prayer, “Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,” is a beautiful mantra for married couples, encouraging us to bring harmony to our relationships and homes.

4. St. Maria Faustina (October 5)

St. Faustina’s teachings on Divine Mercy transformed my wife’s faith journey and ultimately led to her conversion to Catholicism. In marriage, mercy is crucial. Faustina’s insights can help us view our spouse through God’s eyes of mercy, fostering forgiveness and compassion. Her words, “Suffering is the greatest treasure on earth; it purifies the soul,” can provide comfort during challenging times in your marriage.

5. St. Teresa of Avila (October 15)

Teresa’s spiritual classic, “The Interior Castle,” offers a roadmap for deepening our spiritual lives. As married couples, we can journey together through this “interior castle,” supporting each other’s growth in faith. Teresa’s teachings on prayer can enrich your spiritual intimacy as a couple.

Embracing Saintly Wisdom in Your Marriage

These saints offer us a treasure trove of wisdom for our marriages. Here are some practical ways to incorporate their teachings:

Create a prayer corner in your home with images of these saints, reminding you of their examples.
Choose one saint each week to focus on as a couple. Read about their lives and discuss how their teachings apply to your marriage.
Pray the Rosary together daily, following St. Louis de Montfort’s advice to do so with faith, humility, confidence, and perseverance.
Practice small acts of love and mercy towards each other daily, inspired by St. Thérèse and St. Faustina.
Simplify an area of your life together, following St. Francis’s example.
Reflect on the changing seasons and how they mirror the phases of your marriage. Use this as an opportunity to reaffirm your commitment to serving God together.

As we journey through October, let’s allow these saintly companions to guide us. Their examples of love, mercy, simplicity, and deep faith can transform our marriages, leading us closer to each other and to God. Remember, as St. Teresa of Avila said, “God alone suffices.” When we center our marriages on Him, with the saints as our guides, we build a foundation that can weather any storm.

May this October be a time of spiritual renewal for your marriage, a “second spring” where every moment of love between you blossoms like the colorful leaves of autumn. As the world around us changes, let your love for each other and for God remain constant, a beacon of warmth and light as we move towards the colder months. Embrace this transitional time as an opportunity to deepen your bond, knowing that with faith and perseverance, your marriage can thrive.

Article by Matthew Chicoine.

Matthew is a left-handed cradle Catholic who enjoys reading everything Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, Chesterton and is also an avid comic book fan. He is married to his wife Jennifer and has four children. Matthew’s favorite saints include Athanasius, Catherine of Siena, Teresa of Avila, Philip Neri and John of the Cross. Discover more of his Catholic content by visiting: thesimplecatholic.blog.

September 30, 2025/by Matthew Chicoine

Indescribable Joy

Couples, Couples Catholic Marriage

Read Time: 4 minutes

My Son’s First Reconciliation Journey

What does indescribable joy feel like? Well, this is something that I experienced when my son celebrated his First Reconciliation a few weeks ago. It was a Saturday before his First Communion, and he had a First Reconciliation service.

For a couple of hours, there were some stations that the first communicants were participating in along with their parents, which were highlighting various parts of the Sacrament of Confession.

So we did all those, and there’s just such great beauty in the sacrament.

We talked about the connection to the Sacrament of Baptism, the fact that the first communicants would be wearing a white garment over their first communion outfits. As an outward sign of the invisible garment that they received or they were clothed in with Baptism.

Reconciliation is a way where that baptismal garment is renewed, it’s cleansed again of any sin that a person commits after Baptism. Reconciliation is that sacrament of mercy.

It’s something that God’s mercy is so bountiful that he doesn’t want to hold back.

He welcomes you back with open arms, and he meets you.

He runs towards you.

Much like that image of the forgiving father in the parable of the prodigal son.

An Overwhelming Wave of Emotions

As I was standing in the confessional line with my son, I experienced just an incredible wave of emotion. I had such immense joy, and the only way I could describe it was, there was this joy that originated, that started in my heart, in my innermost being.

It started to radiate out of me, in a way that it couldn’t escape out of my body, except through my tears.

There was a trembling, a deep reverence I felt for God, a deep sense of gratitude that overwhelmed me entirely. My mind, my body, my soul, my heart. It eventually burst forth through tears. Tears of joy, tears of gratitude, tears of sorrow for those times where I did not see, or did I not show myself the best role model for my son, and the times that I failed him and God.

The Light of the Resurrection

So there were all of these emotions, and it was that sense where it was bursting out of me, but in a sense, kind of like how the light burst out of Jesus. At the Resurrection, Jesus was transformed completely, while still retaining his earthly body with its scars and wounds.

This image came to mind as a representation of the light we receive at confession, which is contained within us as a foretaste of heaven.

I couldn’t contain this light, and it burst forth from me in the form of tears of joy.

Overcoming Obstacles with Faith

As I looked at my son, I felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude and pride in what he was doing. He was nervous about confession, and it had been a journey for our family. Diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder at 18 months, he struggled to communicate his needs.

We went through countless therapy sessions over the years to help him reach the point where he could communicate effectively. The fact that he was able to stand before God in the Sacrament of Confession, through the priest, and experience that wonderful gift was something we once wondered if he would receive.

The Joy of First Communion

This past Saturday, when our son experienced his First Reconciliation, it foreshadowed the joy we felt seeing him receive Jesus in the Most Holy Sacrament for the first time. God truly worked in me, bringing me to my knees, figuratively speaking.

I was overwhelmed with emotion, feeling the power of God in that moment. It’s difficult to describe, but it was like a burst of joy, light, gratitude, wonder, and awe.

A Message of Perseverance and Faith

I must admit that I’m not always the best father, and I have sought God’s mercy many times.

In that moment, I experienced a full spectrum of emotions, both sorrow and joy, highs and lows.

It was a beautiful thing.

What I took from this is that our faith stabilizes us, and it is worth it.

If you’re struggling with young children, unsure if you’re doing the right thing by taking them to Mass, and they don’t seem to get it, I encourage you to stick with it.

You’re doing better than you think you are.

You are showing up, being present, being consistent, even if you don’t feel God’s presence. It’s really just in the effort and continuing to show up week after week.

That daily prayer at night, before meals, asking God for help, even the times where you’re frustrated. And just thanking God for the moments, for the simple things. Those are the things that really help, that lead you to these monumental milestones, like First Reconciliation.

Conclusion

I really wanted to share a little bit about this experience I had, witnessing my son preparing for the Sacrament of Confession. It’s just been a joy to experience, and I’ve been meaning to share this story so much. I’ve had a variety of things that life has hit my family and me with. Vehicle issues, medical issues with my family, lots of struggle, anxiety.

But I had to share the good news, that God is so merciful.

He works in us, He works through the Catholic Church with administering the Sacrament, and it’s just a beautiful way to experience God. God bless you and your family!

Article by Matthew Chicoine.

Matthew is a left-handed cradle Catholic who enjoys reading everything Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, Chesterton and is also an avid comic book fan. He is married to his wife Jennifer and has four children. Matthew’s favorite saints include Athanasius, Catherine of Siena, Teresa of Avila, Philip Neri and John of the Cross. Discover more of his Catholic content by visiting: thesimplecatholic.blog.

March 17, 2025/by Matthew Chicoine

How to Rejoice with Gratitude & Humility

Couples, Couples Catholic Marriage

Read Time: 5 minutes

The rite of Holy Matrimony is beautiful.

Not only for the day of the wedding, but it bears fruit for years to come. One of the sections I have constantly reflected on during my marriage is the pledge to be faithful in all circumstances.

Here’s an excerpt of that portion of the Marriage Rite.

The bridegroom says:

I, (Name), take you, (Name), to be my wife. I promise to be faithful to you, in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love you and to honor you all the days of my life.

The bride says:

I, (Name), take you, (Name), to be my husband. I promise to be faithful to you, in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love you and to honor you all the days of my life.

While the strongest moments of my marriage have occurred through the suffering we endured together (miscarriages, medical issues, stress at work, etc), the high points are things I struggle to reflect on as deeply and celebrate more frequently.

I actually find it easier to be grateful to God for sustaining me during the valleys than to rejoice on the great mountaintops He brings me to.

This article will look at a few ways that my wife and I have learned to intentionally rejoice together with gratitude and humility for the many blessings God has bestowed upon us.

The Difference Between Joy and Happiness

It’s important to make a distinction between joy and happiness. While the thesaurus links the two as synonyms, there are key differences. Happiness is more of a fleeting feeling. It’s usually evoked by an external thing, person, or moment. But, it fades when the external stimuli goes away.

Joy is something far deeper and more long lasting. It dwells deeper, in the heart and in the soul.

According to Saint Paul VI in his encyclical on joy, Gaudete in Domino, “Christian joy is the spiritual sharing in the unfathomable joy, both divine and human, which is in the heart of Jesus Christ glorified.” The joy we receive (like all the other graces) in the sacrament of marriage is of supernatural origin.

Joy is a gift of the Holy Spirit.

Gratitude is the Harbinger of Joy

While joy is a gift from God and not something we can conjure up on our own, we can prepare for receiving this gift. According to Blessed Solanus Casey, “Gratitude is the first sign of a thinking, rational creature.” Gratitude allows us to see our lives as a chapter of a grander story.

A good story.

A beautiful story.

A true story.

And a truly joyful story.

While happiness relies on the “good” things that happen to you, joy is a gift you can receive in good AND bad times. And gratitude is the soil by which the seed of joy is planted, grown, and come to fruition.

In my marriage, I have learned the power of gratitude, but it took years to realize it.

Early in our marriage, I shied away from suffering. I became bitter when things didn’t work out the way I planned or anticipated. This led to an ungrateful mindset, but then God sent my wife and I to the school of suffering.

We experienced several miscarriages (the most severe in 2014 and 2017), and our losses taught us (me specifically, as my wife has a more overall grateful heart) that life is not to be taken for granted.

Since those losses, I have learned the importance of being more grateful. Now, no matter how bad my day goes, I can look back and find something to be thankful for even if it’s not in the immediate moment.

Living Liturgically Provides a Foundation

Along with the suffering God blessed me and my family with over the years, receiving God’s graces through the liturgy has been a source of refreshment and strength. My wife and I developed strong devotions to the Blessed Virgin Mary, in particular Mary Undoer of Knots.

A simple way we have lived liturgically is by having sacred art and statues in our home. The Christian home is the domestic church (or, as I like to call it, the micro-church). We also have found spiritual friendships with Saints Teresa of Avila, Catherine of Siena, and Gerard of Majella.

To live liturgically is to seek to find God’s work throughout the year.

We set the foundation by attending Mass once a week on Sundays and on holy days of obligation. The next step we made was to celebrate our family’s “patron saints”. Days like April 29, September 21, and October 15 took on new meaning. They became days we looked forward to.

Frequent confession and Eucharistic adoration are other ways my wife and I have found to be fruitful for our spiritual life. Receiving God’s mercy and love in the sacramental life have helped to reorient us when life knocks us down. We recently had to deal with a broken vehicle and emergency medical needs for our daughter. But living liturgically has given my wife and I the ability to rejoice with gratitude and humility even amid our struggles.

It’s Not Easy

Rejoicing together with gratitude and humility is a challenge. Life’s suffering makes it difficult. However, these practices help us distinguish fleeting happiness from lasting joy. They cultivate gratitude on a daily basis. The Church’s liturgical rhythms anchor us to God’s unending faithfulness. It opens us up to joy’s supernatural gift.

In our darkest valleys, my wife and I maintain devotion to Mary and the saints. We frequently celebrate sacraments. We celebrate liturgical seasons in our home church. All of this together helps us rejoice and thank God for blessings. Our hope is that all couples would strive to embrace marriage’s joys and sorrows with grateful, humble hearts.

Article by Matthew Chicoine.

Matthew is a left-handed cradle Catholic who enjoys reading everything Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, Chesterton and is also an avid comic book fan. He is married to his wife Jennifer and has four children. Matthew’s favorite saints include Athanasius, Catherine of Siena, Teresa of Avila, Philip Neri and John of the Cross. Discover more of his Catholic content by visiting: thesimplecatholic.blog.

Marriage Every Day™ is the place for couples who want to have fun growing strong marriages. Community chats, free mini-courses, and engaging activities will help you build a marriage you love alongside thousands of couples just like you!

Learn more HERE.

March 14, 2025/by Matthew Chicoine